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Tuesday 12 May 2015

Dreaming about an ex

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Unfinished business 

I often hear from people who dream about their ex-partner, and on some level it might be because there is unfinished business in one or both people's minds,  maybe you think about them now and again or maybe they still take up a large percentage of your daily thoughts. 
The connection is still being made, so your dreams will react as if they are still in your life. The images and symbols might link with getting you to resolve issues in your mind so that you can let go of the link you have with them. It's like free psychotherapy, you will think through the dream and its images and scenarios and in doing so you will consider your own thoughts and feelings about them.
Some people say that they don't want to dream about their ex-partner but they keep popping into their dream, like an unwanted ghost, and that's exactly what they are, a ghost whose presence still lingers long after their physical presence has left your life. 
Firstly, it's important to decide if you want the ex in your dream or not? if you really don't then the likelihood is that they still have a connection with you rather than you with them. They are the ones working out what they need to resolve, you are also involved in this process if you allow it, but this is all done on a subconscious level. 

If your own feelings for them are still prevalent then you may dream about them until you have resolved your issues or moved forward and let them go. A lot of people wonder what if! what if things had been different or if we hadn't acted in a certain way, could we have worked things out? When some time has passed it is easy to get caught up in the idea that someone is still the right one for you, even though a relationship has shown you that they weren't.  Ex's often turn up in a dream when your connection can't be broken. for example, when you have children together or when you still see each other regularly for another reason. This makes it harder to move forward with your life and your dreams about your ex might reflect this. 

One lady I spoke with who had a particularly difficult break-up with her ex kept dreaming about him even though she has broken all contact with him, in the end, she mentally told him to stay out of her dreams, she said "I banished him from dreams! I sent 'out' the message that I didn't want him in my dreams for any reason." The cosmos must have heard me because the dreams stopped from then on. She said from her perspective she didn't have any unfinished business with him, it was he who wouldn't let her go. He was controlling and she had no freedom in the relationship, it seemed like after physical contact was severed with him he then started turning up in her dreams and she was having none of it, and asked the cosmos for help.

On a subconscious level we can dip in and out of other people's dreams, we may or may not be aware that we are sharing their dream experience, sometimes people share a dream and mention it aloud in the waking life but often people don't say anything and consider that it was their dream alone. Family and close friends will dream of each other all the time, so it's natural that their dreams are linked, perhaps they have shared different aspects of the same dream, each taking what they needed from the same story.
This is how the shared collective consciousness works. When people break up it can take a while for the collective consciousness to acknowledge the fact that you now want independence from the other person, especially when your natural thoughts are still focused on them. The bond will be broken eventually when you are not thinking about them anymore and they are not thinking about you. 

I dreamed about my ex-boyfriend and I was waiting for him to come out from school to have a meal in a restaurant but I ran out of mobile battery, so I decided to have a coffee somewhere. I was sat inside a truck and I saw him walking on the street. He was holding hands with another girl but I understood that she was just a friend, he usually calls his girlfriends ‘friends’. I went to say hello and tried to kiss him but he didn't respond. However, he looked surprised and glad to see me. His eyes looked alive. I stood there waiting for him to go and drop his friend somewhere, then I took a taxi. The taxi first dropped a woman in Greece. I asked the driver (who looked like he had suspicious eyes) where we were, on ‘Greece street’ or Greece the country? He said both. I asked because everything outside looked green and beautiful.

Your ex-boyfriend is in school which is where people go to learn, so it seems that while you haven’t been together he has learned a lot of things, maybe about life and relationships. Perhaps your previous relationship ran out of energy while you were waiting for him to grow up and learn a few lessons about love. This is common in relationships, by the time a person has developed and grown enough to have a decent relationship the other person has given up waiting for changes, and the relationship has run out of steam.

A mobile phone which often replaces the telephone in dream imagery is symbolic of communication and therefore also provides a representation of the communication that was needed in your relationship. The fact that the battery died explains how communication had died between you both. Also, the fact that you are in a truck gives you some more information, instead of driving your message home to him gently you used a truck which is a symbol for when you use more force than is needed. In contrast to this, it could mean that you should have used more force to get your point over to him.
(hard to say without knowing your personal circumstances) 
Did you ever tell him what you wanted from him? It looks like he has moved on now, although you seem to be of the opinion that they are only friends and this may or may not be true. The eyes are the windows to the soul and you say that his eyes looked alive, perhaps he is in a good place right now and has moved forward and learned a lot about life and love. 
Maybe this is just how you are viewing him now but it doesn't mean its true. You wait for him while he drops off his friend, maybe you are waiting for him to finish with this new relationship so that you can rekindle your own relationship with him on a better footing than before.

Let’s think about Greece for a moment and the symbolism it is trying to relay to you. It is a beautiful country for sure and a wonderful place with warm and amazing people. But underneath the surface of this, they have been struggling for quite some time to manage a collapsing economy. You might be forgiven for thinking that the grass is now greener on your ex-boyfriend's side of the fence and that he has learned a lot from your time apart but please consider that there might still be issues underneath what you can't see on the surface. 

The taxi driver describes someone in your life who takes you where you need to go, in this case, you will be once again in unknown territory, meaning that the relationship can still take twists and turns that you don’t expect. You could end up feeling as though there are some positives and some negatives to the relationship and you are actually no better off than you were last time around. You don't trust the taxi driver anyway because you know that you could end up in a situation that on the surface looks wonderful, but is it?

Then I dreamed that I was talking to an ex-boss of mine. I had been promoted and I could see my new contract in my current job, plus I had a pay rise. But I was still doing the same job. The company had only changed the title of my occupation and it was misspelled on the contract. I was happy about the pay rise but a bit frustrated because I hadn't actually got a better job. However, the company seemed benevolent and I was telling the ex-boss of mine that I had a pay rise every year anyway.

This is another way of explaining to you that you might think that you are getting a good deal when in actual fact it’s the same deal as you had before. This might relate to the ex-boyfriend, perhaps he acted like he was your boss, I wonder if he tried to control you last time around? It could also relate to work of course and literally represent another situation where you want to do better but other people don't deliver what they say they can.

The last dream I remember, I was with a group of people inside a flat. I think we were having a party. Then I went outside and I saw the upper level of the building burning, they were big flames. Everybody went outside and we thought we were lucky to have noticed in time. Then I remember a huge explosion that didn't damage anything. That’s all I remember.

This last section of the dream is making you aware that forewarned is forearmed, you can make better choices if you have more information. It seems to me that you have been given more information through these dreams, you have been warned that things will not necessarily be any different this time around where your ex-boyfriend is concerned. At the moment you are enjoying life, having a party so to speak, you are enjoying freedom and friends. You can avoid those explosive situations and you can avoid the damage that can be done by being up-close to situations or people that are volatile. 

Buildings symbolise how your life is structured, how it is built upon solid ground, a life where you have support from your friends and family. They keep you upright. The explosions and fire represent how your secure set up can be destroyed if you don't listen to your own instincts. 

Fire is often used to represent passion and how it can get out of control, sometimes we are overcome with passion even when we know that it isn't the best course of action. I would like to add that you mention that the huge explosion didn't cause any damage, maybe you feel that the explosion of passion you feel won't cause any damage. 

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